My most embarrassing new mom moment
Being a new mom is riddled with embarrassment. The birth process alone leaves all mothers without a lick of shame once that baby pops out. The doctors, nurses, and your partner have seen it ALL. You literally have to wear a diaper as liquids pour out of every crevice of your body against your will. These are all things that new moms go through that could be considered embarrassing, but that is not the story I will be telling today.
No no. My story involves my first encounter with the outside world after birthing my first child. I was holed up at home for a week trying to breastfeed (and failing), pumping, bottle feeding and just in a hole of darkness. My mother in law offered to watch my baby so I could go and grab some food from Trader Joes. I had never been so excited to go to a grocery store in my life.
I was alone, and a small part of me thought about throwing my phone out the window, running away to the nearest casino and spending a few weeks there by myself because I forgot how amazing it was to only worry about yourself and not a tiny human. Alas, I found myself inside Trader Joes and I was on cloud nine. I had never been so excited to be in public and interacting with real people. I was chatting up everyone in the store and enjoying a sense of normalcy.
I finally made my way to the checkout stand and the cashier was a young man no older than 20. He was humoring me as I discussed birth, isolation, and my new world as the line behind me grew quickly. He was finishing up scanning the items as I tucked my reusable bags under my arm to pay for the groceries. I finally wrapped up my story about a minute later and the young man reaches his hand straight towards me. I thought to myself “I knew it, we’re besties now” and I SHOOK HIS HAND aggressively and said “so nice to meet you, I’m Laura”. He just blankly stares at me. For what felt like an eternity. I felt so confused because he didn’t say his name. He pulled back his hand and said “ma’am………your bags?”
THEN I STILL DON’T UNDERSTAND until he points to the reusable bags that I had tucked underneath my arm and I realized he had no interest in meeting me, he just wanted to bag my items. Talk about being mortified. I handed the bags to him and not another word came out of my mouth. I have never been back to that Trader Joes since. (Not because of that story, but because of the parking lot honestly. If I die in a fiery crash it will be in the TJs parking lot).
Either way, this story is for all of you moms that suffer from mom brain because honestly my daughter is almost 5 years old and I still have moments like this more often than I would like to admit. And I hope that this story makes you feel less alone in the motherhood hole. You’re not alone and you are loved.
